The Friend Zone: Land Of The Lost

By Thomas Agnew

One of the most discussed things between young lovers in the adult life. The friend zone is one of the most dreaded creations known to men and one of the most celebrated gifts of dating to women. Though more commonly used in reference to where men stand in the pursuit of the panties, women have been subjected to the stiff arm of zones more commonly in the recent years. We already have obstacles that we have to worry about which include meeting, communication, dating, seasonal cuffing, etc., but then we have to deal with the goal line stance of getting in the end zone or turnover of downs.

Even though we treat the friend zone as “are we f*ckin or what” © Jadakiss  or “we just friends,” I believe there are four zones that need to be accounted for:

We Just Met:

One of the safest zones to be in. Why? This is where you get to look or stare each other down, figure out if you really want to pursue this new adventure, or call an audible and choose another hot route. The only problem with this area is that women already have figured out half of the time if they’re going to let you party in their pants or not. Most women say they know who they’re going to have sex with but I find that to not be totally true.

We’re Just F*ckin:

Just that. No common talk. No how are you doing’s. No let’s go to the movies. No “cook me links with those grits” in the morning.

Friends with Benefits:

One of the hardest zones to be in but might have the most benefits but also the most headaches in the end. We’ve seen the movie. Mila was trying to be a hard ass and just get loose with Justin on a friendship tip. If you have good agreement it works for a while. Most of the time one of the others catches feelings. It may be one likes the other, one gets jealous, or actually that’s it.

I Lost:

You’re friends. There’s a 90% chance you’ll never find your way to the other zones ever again. But they say good friends often make for the best relationships.

Now that we have the zones listed, you have to wonder “how do I get into these categorized zones?” I would say communication is the only key. No matterI how awkward the situation, you have to figure out where you are. But really are there other factors that help you categorize people? Can you exist in two zones at once?

Leave your comments or debate with us on Twitter at @jenesismagazine

  • sarliz

    nice article. i can def relate to it and im sure everyone else in the world can as well. communication is key. one person could want to be in a totally different zone than the other then its just all outta wack.

    • Thomas Agnew

      I read a chick saying on one of these many social networks “just put it out there in the beginning, say what you want” but how often does that happen or work?

      • K-Mo

        I always say what I want up front. The “we’re just f*ckin” and “friends with benefits” are 2 zones I wanna stay out of, especially as I get older!

        • Thomas Agnew

          Closed mouths don’t get fed. Definitely have to let people know what you want. I think it’s hard for some people because they don’t want to spoil the game they’re plotting.

  • VeeAye

    Dope article! Finally someone broke it down! Lol! Great football references!

  • Chris Porter

    Great article. Can’t wait to hear the lady’s side. I find that timing is key also. Sometimes, if you don’t ask if she single/f’ckin or not before knowing her damn name, you just got 21’d in the first quarter.

  • Bree

    I am most definitely a fan of saying what you want from the very beginning. This however does not mean that the other person or even you won’t change your stance. At least by being up front, whatever party decides that they want to see if the rules can be bent realizes that they can’t be upset if the other party doesn’t want to also bend the rules, this is what they signed up for.

  • Ashton Lynne

    Thomas, this is a great topic as we are in a time where people are scared to know or find out the truth! People get so caught up in trying to prove something to someone else, they end up stuck in situations they don’t want to be in. If any of you are interested in learning some steps on learning to be comfortable with yourself, checkout my article on the subject